A Gadget to Save Your Marriage

by BrendaReeves

It's not the big things like sex, money and children that make marriage so hard. It's the little things like not putting the toilet seat down after using it..

There isn't a married woman alive that hasn't gotten up in the middle of the night, gone to the bathroom and sat down in a cold bowl of water when she's half asleep. This happens while hubby is snoring away peacefully in bed. You tell him over and over to put the toilet seat down after using it. He asks you why you can't put it down. It becomes a power struggle. You're both determined to make the other put it down. Why should we women have to put the seat down when we weren't the one who raised it up!

The Flush Toilet

A Modern Invention

Thomas Crapper is generally credited with inventing the toilet. Yes, you read that correctly: Thomas Crapper. Although he didn't invent the toilet, he did improve upon the design by inventing the ballcock. I hear you snickering. I swear I'm not making this stuff up. Thomas Crapper, a plumber by trade, was born in 1836 and died in 1910. Famous for his company, Thomas Crapper & Co in London, he received several royal warrants for the quality of his products.

John Harrington invented the first flushing toilet in 1596. Many other people improved upon it throughout the years.. But this article isn't about who invented the toilet, it's about your marriage. Men, you want to sit in this in the middle of the night.  

Men, would you want to sit down in this in the middle of the night? No! Well, neither does your wife!

                                                                                                          

Judge Judy

No Nonsense Wife

Guys, imagine for one moment being married to Judge Judy. I know, it's a scary thought. But now that I've got your attention, I'm going to tell you a little story about Judge Judy and how she solved the problem of her husband leaving the toilet seat up. It's not for the weak of heart.

Judge Judy wrote a book titled "Beauty Fades, Dumb is Forever: The Making of a Happy Woman." The title is a reference to something her father would say when he thought she was placing too much importance on her looks as a teenager. I must say, that was a very smart father.

Judge Judy relates in her book how she solved the toilet seat problem: One night, after sitting in a bowl of cold water for the umpteenth time, she came up with a solution. She went into the kitchen, and got two of the biggest pot lids she could find out of the cupboard. That's pot lids like in what you cook dinner with. She took them back to the bedroom, hopped up on the bed and straddled her husband. Judy could have hit him in the head with them, but she did something better. She raised them up and slammed them together as hard as she could like a couple of symbols.

"From now on, if I wake up in the middle of the night, you're going to wake up," she yelled. It solved the problem. 

Ladies, I don't recommend this if your husband just returned from fighting in Iraq.

Lav Nav

Motion Activated Toilet Light

As far as we women are concerned, this is the greatest invention of all time. It's better than the vacuum cleaner, dishwasher, washing machine and dryer. All you do is peel the paper off the stick on tape and attach it to the bottom of the toilet lid. When you walk into the bathroom, either a red light or green light comes on. Red indicates that hubby didn't put down the toilet seat and green indicates that he did. When it's red, there's also a bulls eye for the guys. They love trying to hit the target. I love the soft glow the light gives. It's very pretty and calming. However, if you don't believe me, just read some of these reviews on Amazon.:

  • I bought this for my husband as a joke stocking stuffer. He installed it for me and ever since I noticed that there hasn't been as many pee messes from midnight trips to the bathroom.
  • If you get up in the middle of the night then the Lav Nav is what you want. No more missed shots for guys and no more falling in for gals. You just can't beat it.
  • Just enough light to not need the bathroom light. The different colors for seat position is a genius idea.
  • Awesome! Finally a product that really works like it says. Alleviates the bright bathroom lights and or fans at 2am for a quick pee!
  • This thing is pretty cool, it has a motion sensor on it and will automatically shut off after a while saving the batteries, as well as when you close the lid, we have a teenage boy at home so this comes in handy in the middle of the night.

Most people gave this gadget five stars. Two unhappy customers said this: "The greatest con is that after you leave the motion area, the light stays on for a very long time. I timed it, and one time it stayed on for 54 minutes. It basically kept me up at night."

It shuts off after you put the toilet seat down, honey!

"I liked the idea of this but not long after writing the review the unit died! I didn't even get 2 weeks."

Change the battery. Is that too much to ask? The real problem has been solved.

So there you have it. Your marriage is saved, and the Lav Nav is much cheaper than a divorce.

 

Updated: 03/29/2013, BrendaReeves
 
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BrendaReeves on 06/26/2016

Thank you for your comment.

blackspanielgallery on 06/25/2016

Interesting idea.

BrendaReeves on 05/30/2013

Thank you. That's a gadget that every house should have.

marciag on 05/30/2013

Totally enjoyed your page and had a chuckle as well. Great topic!

BrendaReeves on 05/14/2013

Thank you for the comment. I for one have sat down in a bowl of cold water.

PeggyHazelwood on 05/13/2013

How funny. You're right. It's the little things that lead to divorce! ;o)

BrendaReeves on 03/29/2013

Living alone like we do solves the problem altogether. Thanks for commenting.

Ragtimelil on 03/29/2013

I loved this! And I live alone! (at least my dogs don't use the toilet.)

BrendaReeves on 03/23/2013

This is so true, Sam. My brother was discussing this with a friend one day. His friend said, "You know, it's just a lot easier if you put the toilet seat down." Some couples just enjoy the power struggle I imagine. Thanks for the comment.

Sam on 03/23/2013

The real proof of love would be if I, a woman, think of leaving the seat up for him and he would remember to put it down for me. No conflict, just remembering each others preferences ...


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