Honestly, most days I feel like a terrible mother. I'm tired and cranky, and have a million things on my to do list. My kids watch way too much Netflix, and I often get tired of being begged to do something, usually right as I'm about to finally accomplish one of the million things on my to do list.
Don't Tell me I'm a Great Mom
Being told I'm such a great mom often makes me feel more guilt for the bad days. I'm not always that great of a mom.
As a mother, it's hard to not feel guilt when you don't feel like you are accomplishing everything. There's a lot of pressure, usually put on by yourself, to be able to handle it all. Most of us try our hardest, but often feel like we're failing. Being constantly told what a good mother I am sometimes makes me feel more guilty for the days I struggle.
I don't feel like I do anything special to be considered a great mother. I home school, but that's because it's the best choice for my family. I don't think it makes me a better mom than those that don't. In fact, I suffer a lot of doubt in that area, and am always afraid of letting them down.
My husband and I recently decided to switch to peaceful parenting when we realized that the way we were running things wasn't working and our relationships with our children were suffering. The old habits of yelling are really hard to get rid of, and I often catch myself yelling again. I've gotten better at calming down and apologizing quickly, though.
I have several health problems, and some days I can't do much. It's not always easy to do simple things, like taking my children outside to play. I know it makes them sad when I have to tell them I'm not feeling up to it, but I've watched as they've grown to be very compassionate children. They'll tuck me in, hand me their teddy bears, and tell me to get some rest. I often hear, "I'll take care of it, Mommy," from my oldest.
Even though there are many days I feel like a terrible mother, there are many days when my kids are all piled in my lap and we're reading a book, or we're giggling together, or they run to give me loves; even though I haven't gone anywhere, and I realize I'm doing alright.
Part of parenting is teaching your children how to apologize, and I definitely lead by example. Watching me make mistakes and own up to them helps them realize it's alright, and they can move on. They are quick to forgive, and very loving children.
Some days are hard. That's life. They don't make me a bad parent. I pick myself up and try again. My kids are fed, clothed, and warm. They know I love them, and in the end, isn't that what's important?