I regularly check the search statistics on my articles about infertility, to see what phrases and words lead people to them via Google and other search engines. The results are quite often painful - and sometimes even infuriating - for me to read. For just one of my pages the other day, I saw the following results among those searched-for phrases over the past month:
- "why are people so insensitive about infertility"
- "why am i infertile but bad people are not"
- "my mom doesn't understand infertility depression"
- "family insensitive with our infertility"
- "why don't people care about infertility"
- "infertility made me a horrible person"
- "devastated because infertile"
But one search phrase that really struck me was "There is no point in living when you're infertile" - because the sad thing is, I have struggled with that very feeling from time to time myself. I think most people who have battled infertility have been there and felt that way, in their darker moments - perhaps emphasized when we hear others talk about how having children has been the most important thing in their lives, something which gave them purpose and meaning in living that they did not have before.
Does that mean our lives have no meaning, no purpose, without children? Are we doomed to know only a "lesser existence" without children?
In those dark moments, it's important to remember all the many ways we can and do find meaning in life without children. Ways we can contribute to the world around us - to future generations - even if we may not have children of our own. A life without children can have great meaning and purpose, often in ways that might be difficult if not impossible to fully pursue or achieve if we did have children to care for daily.