Does Having a Baby make you Happier?

by Justanopinion

A new study has been released stating that parents are happier than Childless couples. Is it true?

Being a parent is a rollercoaster ride at the best of times, particularly when you have a few kids separated by just a couple of years. A new study has been released stating for the first time in a few years that parents are happier than childless couples but is this true? Why do couples choose not to have children? Why do some choose to become parents when all the odds seemed to be stacked against them?

Are you a parents or are you a childless couple?

Sleepless nights

The joys of parenting

"Not Again!" I think aloud as I am thrust into wakefulness by my baby's wailing for the umpteenth time that night. OK, maybe I exaggerate but I had been awake every other hour as she struggled with the sniffles. Yes, I am sympathetic to the poor girl's plight but I just want a good night's rest - Is that so wrong?

All ability to enjoy a 'good night's rest' has become a part of my distant past.  It all came to an end when I gave birth to my first child four years ago and then stupidly gave birth again a few months ago.  BUT Hallelujah! I am happier for it! or so I am told by a study recently performed and about to be published by psychologists at the University of California, Stanford and University of British Columbia.

I am still on the fence about that!

Some reasons people give for not having children

The media - TV, newspapers, radio - have given us all the impression that children are hard work, so it is unsurprising that the number of people choosing not to become parents is growing year on year.  Or people choose to have just the one child for a variety of reasons as well.  For instance...

  • Women have postnatal depression, fathers feel left out.  Mothers lose their identity,fathers move on to a new woman that appreciates them.  Women expand and become blobs as their bodies are used and abused by a new baby, fathers trade them in for a newer model.

    Who in their right minds would have children?
  • There are those who would suggest that the world is too crowded for us all to have children.  And yet on the news this week, China is in crisis because the number of elderly people outweigh the number of young people by a whole lot.

  • There are those who also would suggest the world is too terrible a place to bring a child into?  As though there is anything new under the sun.  In the days of the Bible - about two thousand years ago - there was as much horridness as there is now.  There are mentions of child abuse, murder, jealousy,wars, floods, earthquakes and everything we have now and more.  The only difference is that we hear of it more often (thanks to the media) and more explicitly.  The news is all about one atrocity or another so who can blame someone for not wanting to subject a child to the horrors.

  • And what of Global Warming?  Maybe the planet will implode as a result of all we are doing now.  Why bring a child into that potential future?  Again, some scientists have differing opinions but the popular ones are on the side of global warming.  I am not completely sure why we would rather believe in the earth imploding but hey... who am I to talk?

Having a baby - Reasons Why

So bearing all the above reasons in mind, should anyone have a baby? Here are reasons others give for giving birth.

  • It is genetic.  We are programmed to choose to multiply, we have no choice in the matter.  In that case, why do some chose not to give birth?
  • They want to share something with the partner one loves so much.  Children are the only lasting thing you can share with a partner you love.  Love comes and goes but children are a legacy of that love.
  • It fulfills some people.  They may feel like their whole life is a failure so the ability to have children is something they can excel at.
  • Children make seem people less lonely.  A child, especially when young, will love unconditionally and always be on your side.  Some people need that for their emotional wellbeing.
  • Some people feel we need good parents to bring well-centered children to offset the riff-raff out there.

So should I have a baby?

Would I choose to have babies again, even though as I write this, my little one scrambles for attention disturbing my otherwise peaceful reverie?


Do I feel happier at present about having children?  I do not think so, at least not at this present moment as all I can think of right now are my childless mates who are probably still asleep, getting that much enjoyed lie-in that has been denied me for the last four years.  (I am selfish, I admit)

However, on the whole, I adore my kids.  Yes, at present, looking after little ones who depend completely on you for their existence is tiring, I would not swap it for anything.  They increase my reasons for being alive.  I have ever been suicidal or depressed and I was one of those that waited to have kids because I did not want anything to hold me back from my career and voluntary causes.  However, the truth is, I am now more centered, more sure of my purpose, less selfish, more patient, more able to stick at things and all-round more joyful.

I know that when die and all I have done disappears into the ether, my children and their children and their children etc will carry something of my partner and I into the future.

That is my kind of legacy.

Selfish Reasons to Have More Kids: Why Being a Great Parent is Less Work and More Fun Than You Think

In Selfish Reasons to Have More Kids, contrarian economist Bryan Caplan argues that we’ve needlessly turned parenting into an unpleasant chore, and don’t know the real plusses a...

$16.99  $8.56

View on Amazon

Updated: 05/19/2012, Justanopinion
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