Google Alternative: SEO, Backlinking And All That Bull

by humagaia

Google alternative of the future, perhaps? Do we need all this SEO, keyword research and backlinking? Or is just a load of bull?

A Google alternative needs to concentrate on not being Google.
For too long we have been plagued with spam and system scamming, all because Google decides that things are to be done their way.
Without Google would there be the need for SEO, backlinking and keyword research.
If a new alternate Google were produced from the ground up, would it be built on the premise of authority and relevance, as now?
If it were it would be irrelevant.
Time for a complete rethink methinks.

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LakeErieArtists asked me a while back if I would write a few articles about search engines other than Google. This is the first of those articles. It is about an alternative to Google that I would like to see, rather than one that already exists. I am going to outline the features that would make it the best search engine, for me. But is it all bull?

Oh aurochs!
Oh aurochs!

Current Alternatives To Google

There are many global and local search engines that you can use. There are big ones, small ones, some the size of Neptune. None though equal the global coverage of the Big G. The search engines that could be classed as alternatives rely on personal preference rather than corporate might. Those that I would consider to rival the G Force are:

  • Bing
  • Yahoo!
  • Baidu
  • Yandex

The last two are included because they have huge following in their respective home countries, Baidu from China (with a billion internet users), and Yandex from Russia (with half a billion). These two are entering the global search engine marketplace with English versions, but they still have a long way to go.

Bing and Yahoo! have found it necessary to join forces in some aspects to try to eat away at G-man. This is becoming partially successful, in that the percentage of search engine traffic that they are getting is rising slowly, whilst the land of G is being eroded.

We can fix it
We can fix it

Gmopoly is also seeing giants of the social media taking much of internet population away.

The younger internet user has no need for staid old search engine techniques.

They use their social networks to find internet information of interest.

G+ has been invented to try to make G- relevant again.

G Plan to fix it with a little social glue.

Facebook and Twitter have reinvigorated the need for thought in the world of search.

Next Alternative To Google: Do We Need One?

What's wrong with the current Google

And so we come to the present day.

This morning (10th March 2012 - so as to establish that my rights to this idea began before anyone else), I received a notification that PamelaNRed recommended a hub, sorry about that Wizzley (that gives me the best segway so - if you want to write at Wizzley:

), that she found to be hilarious [SEO Tips Absolutely No One Needs To KEYWORDS know, by Eric Newland]. You should read it too, if you want to have a laugh(but not now. Wait until after you have finished reading this, as you could otherwise miss the best bit.) I read it. I giggled inside my head. I commented. I tried to be funny also - in my comment - probably unsuccessfully. And I added at the end that perhaps we should club together to make a spoof Google - SPOOGLE. I was not serious about it, then.

It just frustrates me occasionally.

Actually it angers me a lot that, as a writer, I have to:

  • jump through hoops
  • compromise my integrity
  • waste my time 

Panda'ing to God.

And as a searcher, Golem annoys me intensely by:

  • assuming it knows what is best for me
  • still gives me BS results.
En Raging bull
En Raging bull

But it got me thunking (sic.). I do thunk occasionally, or at least I have been known to thunk. And that thunking went something like this:

  • GBS caused whole industries for SEO, keyword research, back-linking and all that BS.
SEO, backlinking, keyword research. All Shocking!
I'm shocked
I'm shocked
  • These exist only because there is a need to Gloze, get it to tell the world that certain content exists.
  • Without the Googlemonster we could write proper stuff, straight from the mind, without having to worry that some algorithm would deem it worthy.
  • Without Gila we would not have to try to get 'worthy' websites to link to our offerings.
  • Without Ginderella (sic.) we would not have to search for the Ugly Sisters, K & R.
  • Without the G-authority test there would be no need to play the system.
    Perhaps a level playing field could be in place for all to play on.

That was my thunking.

Next Alternative To Google: A Level Playing Field

We do need an alternative

I had breakfast, thunking all the while. It was becoming a habit - must attend TA.

And this is where I'm thunking at now. Starting from scratch.

Standing for no bull
Standing for no bull

Incorporating all the current needs, current topics and current possibilities. Incorporating the needs for information and the recommendations from the social internetworks. Incorporating the need for relevance and quality. 

Removing any need to dupe the algorithm. Removing the out-of-date and replacing with the contemporary. Removing spam and corn beef. Removing the plagiarism and copyright infringement. Removing the monopoly and replacing with Cluedo.

We should no longer have to pass 'Go' to collect our just rewards. I want just rewards for just content.

Time for a level playing field - unless you are Yeovil Town (ancient British football humour there).

Confusing bull
Confusing bull

The BIG problem with Gserps is that they make assumptions about what we 'want' to see.

Googlings assume that we are interested that:

  • someone other than us decides which other content is worthy of a link (backlinking)
  • some webpage has just the right number of occurrences of a phase (SEO)
  • someone has worked out that a phrase would be good to write about because that could earn them some money (keyword analysis)

All this is NOT what we want.

What we want is well-written content that:

Is this 'pie in the sky' or just utter bull?
Is it bull?
Is it bull?
  • Entertains us (a voice we can relate to, poems, short stories, music, YouTube)
  • Fulfils a need (How to, sales articles)
  • Gives us the information we require, to the depth of our need (Wiki, short informative articles)
  • Keeps us up to date (recent content, News)
  • Deconstructs what others say, and puts a new twist on it (blogs)
  • Compares and contrasts what is available (reviews and sales articles).
  • Does all the things that we cannot be bothered to do (research, sales pitch articles)

That is NOT what we get.

Come on 'make my day'!
Come on 'make my day'!

Google Alternative

Built from the bottom up

How do we get this Utopian alternative to Gaudi?

Bottoms up. Oops, Freudian slip, I mean 'bottom up'.

We start from the position we want to be in.

  • Level playing field
    Whether a page has been around for years or a few minutes (recency) should not impart any positive or negative relevance. The only criterion that should be of interest is whether it is relevant (to the individual).
    Whether it has 20 billion back-links or none cannot determine relevance.
    Whether or not a particular keyword sequence appears cannot determine relevance.
  • User generated relevance
    It is only the searcher that can determine if the content fulfils their need, not another website (backlinks), nor the fact that an irrelevant result has been placed in front of them (bounce rate).
    Each page should be rated by the searcher for relevance - your vote counts!
    Each searcher could be rated for the relevance of their ratings.
    If you are worried about privacy, all this kind of data is already held by Gsnooper, somewhere. 
  • Semantic alternatives (we decide what meaning we meant).
    Instead of placing connotations on the meaning of an entered keyword search by an algorithm, we should be asked which alternative meaning we had in mind. The keyword database should be used for this.
    Once this has been established, then the most relevant keyword alternatives should be presented and all those we deem to be relevant should be used in the database search. Any user generated relevance should be used to determine the order in which the results are presented.

Google & Alternatives

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Name the Google Alternative

Which of these names would you prefer?
  Display results
I have updated with the names proffered in the duel module

Add the name you would like

as an alternative to my names
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Alternative name I like
Dave Johnson on 10/13/2012

john111 on 03/14/2012


teddletonmr on 03/11/2012


No bull
No bull



If this Google alternative is implemented by anyone, I will sue. To stop me from suing for billions of dollars, you will need to employ me as a consultant.

My fee for my services is set at 0.01% of total revenue. Not just profit, nor net income, just total revenue!

We can consider that a contract is in place by the simple fact that you read it here first.

All pictures in this articles were reproduced from clker, a free picture resource


The following words and phrases deserve explanation:

  • Big G = 'Google' alternative
  • G Force = alternative to 'Google' 
The g-force associated with an object in its acceleration relative to free-fall. This acceleration experienced by an object is due to the vector sum of non-gravitational forces acting on an object free to move. The accelerations that ...
  • G-man = different 'Google'
G-Man is a slang term for Special agents of the United States Government. It is specifically used as a term for a Federal Bureau of Investigation agent. According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, its first known use in America was in ...
  • G = alternate Google
  • Gmopoly (pronounced gee'mopoly) = a Google monopoly
  • G+ = Google future
Google+ is a social networking and identity service, operated by Google Inc. The service was launched on June 28, 2011, in an invitation-only "field testing" phase. Early invites were soon suspended due to an "insane demand" for new ...
  • G- = Google past
  • G Plan = Google plan
G-Plan was a pioneering range of furniture in the United Kingdom, produced by E Gomme Ltd of High Wycombe. In 1943, during World War II, furniture was part of rationing in the United Kingdom; the Board of Trade set up the Utility scheme ...
  • SPOOGLE = not Google
  • God = Google as a deity
  • Golem = Google as a monster
In Jewish folklore, a golem is an animated anthropomorphic being, created entirely from inanimate matter. The word was used to mean an amorphous, unformed material in Psalms and medieval writing. The most famous golem narrative ...
  • GBS = Google BS
  • Gloze = Google flattery
  • Googlemonster = differentiated 'Google'
  • Gila (monster) = poisonous Google
{{Taxobox | name = Gila monster | status = NT | status_system = iucn3.1 | status_ref = Though the Gila monster is venomous, its sluggish nature means that it represents little threat to humans. However, it has earned a fearsome reputation and ...
  • Ginderella = oppressed Google
Cinderella is a fictional character and is the main protagonist from Disney's twelfth animated film Cinderella and its two sequels. In the original film she is voiced by the late Ilene Woods. The Disney version of the character was ...
  • K & R = the ugly sisters Keyword and Research
  • G-authority = Google authority
  • TA = Thunking Anonymous
  • 'Go' = Google platform
  • Gserps = Google results pages
  • Gsnooper = Google personalized information (see adchoices)
  • Googlings = Google employees
  • Gaudi = Google Gothic
Antoni Gaudí i Cornet was a Spanish Catalan architect and figurehead of Catalan Modernism. Gaudí's works reflect his highly individual and distinctive style and are largely concentrated in the Catalan capital of Barcelona, notably ...
Updated: 02/05/2021, humagaia
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katiem2 on 05/10/2012

I love it, I'm looking forward to bullbgone....

humagaia on 03/13/2012

Used DuckDuckGo and found that the results were pretty much the same as Google.

brettb on 03/13/2012

Try DuckDuckGo as well, it's a pretty decent Google alternative.

humagaia on 03/11/2012

Fun with a little tinge of reality

teddletonmr on 03/11/2012

Fun stuff here @humagaia :)

humagaia on 03/11/2012

G_S Google databases are too entrenched for it to be easy for them to be changed to accommodate much of what I see as the new environment around which a database should be built.
My view is that Google could create a second search engine, using the sort of data that could be extracted from such as Twitter. GoogleToo could run alongside Google and users could choose which they prefer. My guess would be 50+'ers would use Google, 50-'ers would choose GoogleToo. Which then would be the SE to run with? Obviously GoogleToo.
As for working for Google, I am almost housebound. I could consult from my front room.

humagaia on 03/11/2012

Sorry Jo, hope no damage was done to your computer keyboard.

JoHarrington on 03/11/2012

'Panda'ing to God' I just spluttered tea!

humagaia on 03/10/2012

Just sent e-mail to partner with Twitter ;)

humagaia on 03/10/2012

I'm was only quarter-serious about "Know anyone that wants to fund such a project?", but your WireDoo idea is interesting, and I would enjoy beta I think - but it would impact on my Wizzley 'career'!
Thanks for the 'like', chef

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