How to Handle an Emotionally Immature Adult

The immature adult only thinks of himself or herself. They cannot see your perspective and only want what they want from you; they cannot fathom that you might have needs.

They will take up your time, energy and attention without any intention of giving it up or giving it back. They want all the attention on themselves and no one else. They will use you up.

In fact, they can't see you as a whole person; they only see the part that they want.

In other words, they are greedy. The more you cave into their demands, the more they will demand. The more generous you are, the more they take advantage of your kindness.

For them, it's all taking and no giving. They are insatiable.

The point is, to recognize this. Understand, in this case, it's them not you. Don't blame yourself for their selfishness, and protect yourself.

They will get whatever it is they want from you. Including the fulfillment of their fantasies. They live in an illusory world in which they always seek comfort "out there", from you. They have no idea that they are doing anything wrong, because they are not in their right mind; they never examine themselves.

See these signs, because the first act of dealing with their treachery is to see it for what it is: Selfishness and brutality.

Often, and most likely, the immature narcissist, relies on games and tricks; this is how they hide. They project images to intimidate or to lure you into sympathizing with them. They will try to make you doubt yourself and your perceptions. They hide behind masks.

You will have to rely on your own awareness, see them directly and clearly for what they are doing and what they are. Then you will have to call them out, point out what they are doing, expose them, and let them know they've been found out. You have to bring their darkness to light. It is the only way, if you are forced to deal with them.

Maybe they are family. Maybe you are in a relationship with them that you cannot immediately get out of. If you are going to have to deal with them on a regular basis , it is unreasonable and impractical to simply ignore them and endure their abuse. The quickest way to deal with them, though it might seem difficult at first, is to point out their abuse.

If this seems dangerous, of course, seek help: The police, shelters, counselors and nonprofits offer services in extreme cases.

Of course, the narcissist is entrenched in their thinking and self-absorption. There is no way to change them. Because they don't listen. They only hear themselves and what they want and think.

So, your best bet is to avoid them entirely, create distance, leave them.

The fact is, this is the only way to take care of yourself. It will seem difficult, you might have an enormous amount invested in your relationship with them; maybe they caught you at your most vulnerable state and you got caught up in their games. But eventually you will find that your mental health is worth more than the relationship with a selfish and hurtful person.

You have a life and it is important. You need to build your own life and not rely on another, not rely on someone who is not really considering you and what you truly need. They will eventually use you up and their destruction knows no bounds, as long as they get what they want.

And being alone is better than being dragged down, used up and maybe even destroyed.

This is a case in which you must think about yourself and your own needs and not be dependent or desire anything from someone who will never consider you or those needs.