Joey's World, In His Own Words

by SidewalkPhilosopher

Did you ever wonder how life looks from the dog's point of view? Well, now's your chance to find out!

Joey, a six year old German Shepherd, has decided it is time to hear from the dogs, on what is really important in life. So, this, his second article, is dedicated to all his four legged buddies out there. He is originally from Palatka, Florida and, therefore, has a good, old fashioned Southern accent to go with his southern charm. Come with me now as we settle down to a bird's eye view of Joey's world!

Let Me Introduce Ma' Manly Sef'!

Howdy Folks!!  Joey here!!

Jes’ thought I’d git a note off ta’ ya ta’ say Howdy 'n interduce ma’ se’f. Keep thinkin’ ya’ folks will git to ma’ house sos we git a chance ta’ hang fer’ a spell!

Ta' start wit', I want ta' give ya' th' map ta' ma' first story sos ya' git a chance ta' know me better. In this one, ya' here all bou't whar I cum frum 'n how I got ta' be whur I am t'day! I'm a lucky pup 'n, boy howdy, I'm beholdin'!!

"The Dog's Point Of View"

http://www.squidoo.com/dogs-point-of-view

Lif' has been rit' good ta' me 'n I luv all ma' people a bunch! But, livin' in Florida is tuf' on a fur covered fella' like ma'sef' n' I look for'ard ta' a cool spell!

 

Fin’ley, it’s a’coolin’ off jest a little here whur I live. Boy, Howdy, ever time I step out thet door, I gotta run rite back in agin’ ‘cause it’s sa’ hot. Ma’ fur coat hain’t got no zipper, ya' know. I mean, I love ta’ lie in th’ sun ‘n tan the bod’ jest lik’ any pooch but, Whew!! Anyways, been spendin’ mor’ tim’ in th’ yard ‘dis week, protectin’ the folks, ‘n singin’ wit’ th’ music thet comes off’n th’ road aways off. Luv it when they ser’nade us wit’ thet sir’n thingy!! Hit some real good notes las’ nite, if’n I do say so ma’sef’!!!

Had ta’ go ta’ th’ vet t’other day, which hain’t bad ‘til they put me on thet table thingy thet goes up and down. I hain’t too keen on thet table thingy…lik’ ta’ keep th’ four paws firmly planted, if’n ya know whut I mean! Anyways, I got inside ‘n wus jes’ startin’ ta check out th’ new smells when a crazed cocker spaniel begin ta’ bark at me. I put on ma’ best grin but he jes’ barked louder. About thet time, Jeanie (thet’s ma’ human) told him he’d better stop a’for he scar’t me. Too late!!! I hightailed it in a circle landin’ rite’ bahin’ Jeanie and lookin’ ‘round her legs ‘et thet guy! Everybody laughed lik’ it wus funny but, Boy, Howdy, he didn’t lik’ me…couldn’t they see thet?!!! I prefer ta’ be a lover ma’self…don’t kare much fer fightin’! Th' trip wor' me out sa' bad, had ta' have a nap when I got home!

Ole’ Santi Cla’s has cum’ n’ gone, ya know! I luv Christmas ‘cause I git ta’ go out front ‘n help Mr. Bill put up th’ stuff on th’ house thet looks all purdy! ‘N, gives ma’ manly sef’ a chance ta’ check out th’ four legged cuties as they pass by! Woo! Hoo! Nev’r kin wait ta’ see whut deli’chus morsels o’ dee-lite I find in ma’ big ole’dog paw stockin’!!!!  Slurp!!!! Bet ya'll have th' same 'citment at yo' house, too!!

Speakin’ o’ morsels  o’ dee-lite, Jeanie n' I got ta go ridin’ in th’ van tuther dey ta’ thet place whur’ th’ man cumes ta’ th’ winder ta’ look at thet little card she has a’fore we git ta’ go thru th’ gate. But he don’t have no “dog” treats lik’ t’other places. I don’t think much o’ him!

Anyways, we had ta’ wait o’ spell fer whut we came fer ‘n it wuz eatin’ time. So, we drove ta’ thet buildin’ thet has FOOD!!! Their winder is better then th’ bank winder. All th’ bank winder has is “dog” treats but this winder has stuff wit’ real meat insid’ it!!

Boy, Howdy, ma’ mouth got ta’ waterin’ ‘n I wuz dripper droolin’ all over th’ floor mat by th’ time I got ma’ eats! Shore am glad Jeanie has a sof’ spot fer ma’ sad face!!! Yum!!!!!!!

Shoot, by ‘dis time, I didn’t even keer thet th’ man who looks at th’ card don’t have no “dog” treats!!!!!

I know ‘xactly whut ‘cha thinkin’! “Jo, ya’ don’t need no “dog” treats nor mouth waterin’ morsels o’ dee’lite.” But, come on, a feller has ta’ have sumpun’ to look for’ard to on o’casion so he don’t git bor’d!  

‘Bout couple o’weeks ago, I spent a few days wit’ ma’ vet, Dr. Berger, and his bunch whilst Bill ‘n Jeanie went sumwheres! Boy, howdy, did I have a tim’!!! 

 

They let me run th' place fer ‘em! Didn’t make me stay in one’a them cages lik’ tuther reg’lar dogs, no siree!!  I kept ever’body inner-tained wit’ ma’ charm! I spooze ‘em ever’ time! By th’ tim’ it wuz tim’ fer me ta’ go home, they had started callin’ me “The King!” Well, if’n the shoe fits, ya know!

 

 

Well, gonna have ta’ git ‘cause its time to go out ta’ put ‘dis in th’ mailbox ‘n do sum’ sniffs ta’ see whut messages t’other dogs left fer’ me!!

If’n ya git a chance to cum’ ta’ see me, I’ll share ma’ squirrels on th’ back fence wit’ ya! Wait til’ ya’ see ‘em run when ma’ manly se’f steps out into th’ back yard!! Boy, Howdy, I got ‘em scart’ ‘cause they know whut a terr'r I am!

Ya’ have a grate week! Sur’ hope ya’ find yer way here real soon fer’ a visit!! Keep ya’ nose down and foller tha’ trail. Works fer me!!!

In th’ meantime, may ya’ live wit’ a full bowl ‘n a bod’ free o’ fleas!!!

Luv Frum Th’ Pooch!!  Joey

P.S.

Sorry ‘bout sum o’ ma’ miss’takes but they don’t teach no spellin’ at dog obee’dence skool!    

Here’s smilin’ at ‘cha!!

A Dog's Last Will And Testament

So Thankful For My Home!

Updated: 05/15/2015, SidewalkPhilosopher
 
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I Luv' To Here Frum Folks!!

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SidewalkPhilosopher on 06/07/2022

Derdriu, yes, I did see that story! Jo lived to be 10 1/2 years old. The vet only promised us 7 or 8 years due to his hips but he was a trooper! We lost him in 2018 and still miss our boy! Jo was a gentle giant who loved everyone he met!

DerdriuMarriner on 06/07/2022

SidewalkPhilosopher, Thank you for the autobiographical presentation, pretty pictures and product lines.

All of Joey's story segments acquaint me charmingly with an adventurous, brave, generous, intelligent sentient canine.

But my two absolute favorite segments are about his taking over the vet's office and his wishing us all flea-less bodies and full bowls!

Did you read -- sometime this spring -- about the emaciated sentient canine who stayed with his dead human hiking companion, who had died, for two weeks until someone passed along that same trail?

SidewalkPhilosopher on 01/29/2014

Glad you enjoyed it, Kathy...wish they could get together...I know Jo would enjoy it! And it would give him a new story to tell! LOL

Kathleen Bottroff on 01/28/2014

I really enjoyed it.. surprisingly, every word made perfect sense! Wish he could visit with my dogs. They'd all have a blast.

SidewalkPhilosopher on 01/26/2014

Thanks, Mira...glad you enjoyed!! :)

SidewalkPhilosopher on 01/26/2014

Thanks Nancy...I think they would, too...maybe I'll get him up to SC someday soon. The problem is I have to stay in a motel and, though some allow it, I still worry about trying to deal with him in one...afraid to leave him in a room if I have to leave...worry about someone bothering him there. But Bill and I have talked about it because he gets so upset whenever we leave him for days at a time.

Mira on 01/26/2014

Funny :)

ohme on 01/26/2014

Great job, Joey! When are you going to come and meet Bruno. I think you two would have fun together.

SidewalkPhilosopher on 01/25/2014

Thanks, Michey...hope reading Jo's meanderings weren't too difficult for you! LOL He does carry on!! :D

Michey on 01/25/2014

Gee! Joey, you make me practice the southern "dialect"... I think I have to go back to "school".
So, you are funny, and able to run your territory which makes you the Master Jo, Ma and Pa is proud of you. All the best and keep an eye on squirrels... LOL

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