Rocking Horse Poo

by wrylilt

A look at rocking horse poo, mysteries, myths and uses.

Unlike many more course types of animal excreta, rocking horse dung is prized for its many uses.

It has been compared to fungus truffles and red diamonds in terms of uniqueness and price.

When fed the correct mixture of children's toys and dust, rocking horses have been known to excrete up to 30 grams of dung per week, a rare and highly sought after commodity.

History of Rocking Horse Poo

Although there are records of hobby horses as early as 400BC, the rocking horse as we know it today didn't come into existence till the early 1800's. These toys were originally developed so children in rich families could begin early preparation for real horse riding.

No one is quite sure when rocking horse poo was first noticed or used. It is believed that the horse dung may have been confused with toy wooden marbles, which gained a short burst of popularity in approximately 1846 before fading into obscurity as just another fad.

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Modern Usage - Rare as Rocking Horse S***

This phrase came into usage due to the fact that people occasionally claimed to have seen this item while the majority thought it was a big joke. It is a slang term which refers to the fact that the item is extremely rare (and believed not to exist by some). The phrase describes anything which will rarely, or never, happen.

Phrases with similar meanings include:

  • Rare as hens teeth.
  • When pigs fly. 
  • Rare as a nun wearing a bikini.

Why Rocking Horse Poo is Considered Rare

The reason rocking horse manure is considered so rare is because of the fact that many people don't often recognize it as such - instead dismissing it as a completely different item. The important thing to remember is that different types of rocking horses have different types of dung.

  • Pats or paddys - similar to cow dung.
  • Balls - often confused with cedar balls or building materials.
  • Fine slivers - often mistaken for sawdust or shavings.

Uses for Rocking Horse Manure

Although the most obvious use is on your garden, rocking horse poo only needs a few grams per 5  square metres due to its strong growth properties. It can also be used to attract animals such as unicorns and has been known to add lustre to even the barest skin.

It's important not to use too much of the rocking horse poo, especially on anything living, as it can increase energy levels to a large degree - this is the reason many young children with rocking horses have diagnosed problems with behaviour and sleeping.

Updated: 04/14/2012, wrylilt
 
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blackspanielgallery on 07/16/2015

I never thought about where or when the rocking horse started before.

2uesday on 06/06/2012

I thought you might have discovered an alternative supply of something I could spread around my rhubarb plants in autumn, but sadly not. Still good for a laugh though. I once heard someone say to someone else that they were as much use as a chocolate tea pot, which amused me.

Sam on 06/05/2012

I am sure there is money in this - have you tried selling Rocking Horse Poo on Ebay??? ;-) SY

humagaia on 04/15/2012

As ever, an interesting title makes for additional intrigued readers - hence my journey to this article.
Very amusing!

Holistic_Health on 04/14/2012

Made me laugh :)

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