What Makes a Man Wear Women's Flats?

by katiem2

Read a copy of a real life interview with a man who wears women's flats. Learn what it is about women's shoes that attract men, where he buys them and when he wears them in public.

There are those of us who have a love affair with shoes, both men and women while there are those who could care less. This article is not for the latter of the two. I recently asked one of my male readers who happens to love wearing women's flats for an interview. Much to my delight he accepted. You can read the details as to how this man came to love women's shoes, where he buys them and when he wears them. Enjoy as you learn the truth about men who wear women's ballet flats. I'd like to thank him for this interview it was a delight. I learned a lot and know the readers will as well. The pictures included are contributions of the man I interviewed. Enjoy!

What Is a Ballet Shoe?

The types of ballet shoes men wear are those without a heel.

Let's understand the meaning of the shoe we're discussing here today. This interview covers the ballet flats. I begin by asking the man I'm interviewing to describe the type of shoe to which he will be referring. Below you see a few shoes from his collection. 

Question - You reference ballet flats in this interview, what do you consider to be a ballet flat.

Answer - Ballet flats to me are those cute shoes with no heel at all. Basically just the sole. So a ballet flat gives you no added height. They are also open and expose most of the top of the foot. Some show toe cleavage and some don't but you must be able to see basically all the top of the foot. Ballet flats can be any color, any material but most of all cute and feminine looking. Ballet flats often have bows or some other decoration on the toe part. For example my Tory Burch Revas have the TB medallion on them.


This Man Has Good Taste!


Do You Notice the Shoe's People Wear?

There are those of us who notice a persons shoes while others never do. which are you?
  Display results
If you notices others shoes you no doubt are a shoe lover, if you don't notice other peoples shoes you probably aren't a shoe addict.

Why Do You Wear Women's Shoes?

What could possibly make a man want to wear women's flats?

Question - What do you think makes a man love buying and wearing women's shoes?

Answer - Maybe the same could be said about women. What could possible make a women wear a man's work boots as an article of fashion and not for work? "Could it be we are both one sex or the other turned inside out?" 

Could it be society has assigned a gender to articles of fashion but but the lines are being crossed? When it comes to women and their shoes some people say they are out of control. How many pairs is enough? How many pairs of black shoes or flats do you need? What part of the brain makes women like this? And if we are both on gender are there men who's brains are like this? Shoe guys?


Who are Shoe Guys?

Men of all kinds enjoy wearing women's ballet flats.

Question - What do you mean by the term shoe guy?

Answer - ( I have a few friends that are shoe guys, they talk about the awesome pair of men's shoes they bought or how comfy they are or sometimes even the price. But they are referring to men's shoes)

What if there is a part of the male brain that likes shoes the way women do? There are thousands of guys out there like this, BUT how many guys would actually buy themselves women's shoes or flats?

( For me I've always liked feminine women's shoes. I would see a women's wearing a cute pair of flats and think - WOW those look great on her, I wish I had a pair too. If they were OMG those are cute and I really want a pair, I would search for a store that sold them and then go buy myself a pair. Of course after I bought myself pair could I wear them out in public???)

When a women buys a pair mens shoes or article of mens clothing she can't wait to go out and show her friends as well as show it off in public. Is the reverse true for men??? In the past few years the reverse is slowly happening. "Men/people need to get over themselves and love what they love, who they love and love life to the fullest" So yes men are wearing ballet flats


What Attracts Men to Woman's Shoes

This mans history of wearing ballet flats

Question - When did you first become attracted to women's shoes?

Answer -   In 2005 I went to a Nine West store, pick out a pair of flats I saw a few weeks earlier, asked for my size, and ended up trying them on in the store. The sales girl was awesome and I ended up buying them. I was too afraid to wear them in public very much. In 2007 I went on a trip by myself and wore my flats in public most of the trip. 

That was nerve wracking but I did end up buying a couple more pairs. As time went by and with the help of the internet I learned there were quite a few guys that also wore ballet flats so I was not alone and my desire to wear flats grew. So things carried on, I'd see a women wearing a pair I liked then often get myself the same ones. My big break came in 2009. One of the sale girls and I sorta became close friends. This was great since she knew and didn't care that I wear "women's" shoes. I asked her about her Michael Kors flats one day. Next thing I know she was asking me if I bought a pair yet! Next thing I know I had 5 pairs. We talked openly about ballet flats and what we liked. One day I mentioned I LOVE the Tory Burch flats but have never found a store that sold them. She told me on my up coming vacation where I could get a pair. Now I'm up to ....Too many pairs of Tory flats)


The Reasons Men Wear Ballet Flats

A guy might wear ballet flats for many reasons, anything from being a former ballet dancer to wearing them since they are the only comfortable shoes that fits.

Question - Being a man who enjoys buying and wearing ballet flats and knowing other men who do as well can you offer some insights as to why you think men wear ballet flats. 

Answer - A guy might wear ballet flats for many reasons, anything from being a former ballet dancer to wearing them since they are the only comfortable shoes that fit their foot and EVERYTHING in between. 

A man wearing ballet flats doesn't determine his sexual identity although in peoples minds it might. If a women wears work boots is she a lesbian? She may or may not be but wearing work boots isn't what determines that. She might just like looking a bit more masculine sometimes. Same thing for guys, wearing ballet flats doesn't determine if you a gay or straight. Often it's just his own fashion freedom or expression. And lets face it ballet flats are pretty cute.


Wearing Women's Shoes in Public

What it's like for a guy to wear women's ballet flats in public.

(As a guy that wears flats in public I do receive lots of different reactions. I'm OK with peoples reactions since it is something a bit different. Anything from "look at that guy, he's wearing ballet flats, giggle" or "finger pointing" or even complements. 

I bet I could write a book on some of the more interesting reaction, ha ha.) Other than high heels, ballet flats are very feminine looking shoes and shoe manufactures have stayed away from making them for men. 

But there are lots of men who own a pair or wear them so it's very likely they have ventured over to the women's section of the store to get a pair. It can be very nerve wracking for a guy to try a pair on in a women's shoes store but it does happen.

(I'm a perfect example of that. I always try them on in the store to make sure they fit. After years of just buying them, trying them on at home and finding out they don't fit then returning them I now avoid that hassle. Most sales people are great and some even kinda like to see a guy step outside the gender barriers)



Ballet Flats In Large Sizes

This Tory Burch Eddie Leather & Crystal Bow Ballet Flats is My Next Dream Shoe and it's available in my size, a ladies 10

Where to Find Ballet Flats Sizes for Men

There are a few great places to buy quality fashion ballet flats in larger sizes some men and women find difficult to find.

The List of Quality Retailers Offering Larger Size Flats for Men or Women 

Nordstroms - Has the largest selection of Tory Burch in sizes up to 13

Saks Fifth Avenue - Where I found my dream shoe above in sizes up to 10

Ralph Lauren - I found adorable yet simple flats with nothing on them here up to 11


Tory Burch Flats


Women's Coastal Rain Skimmers

This comfortable and highly functional outdoors ballet flat can be found in sizes up to 11. I found this nice yet simplistic flat at LLBean




LLBean - This shoe is currently on sale. I love this casual shoe for a Saturday out and about. 


Shoe #1 Serena by Tory Burch

Shoe #2 Quinn by Tory Burch

Which Flat do You Prefer?

If you could pick only one pair which Tory Burch flat would you chose?

I'd pick shoe #2
John on 02/05/2016

I love shoes that are patented and not having decorations from the sides.

leon on 11/26/2015

I all so love ballet flat they are comfortable shoes and light on the feet

vinsy on 09/16/2015


I love to wear flats as well, can you recomend me some shoes which i can wear on male attire and never get recognized i am wearing women shoes ?

Jeff on 08/24/2015

Love the look of the second one.I don't like the black or the first one.

Bob on 04/28/2015

I don't, personally, care for the "flats". I would rather a pair of strappy sandals.
I like to show off my toes, so I go for the "summer shoes". Anything comfortable, and open is good, since my cva has caused me so much foot trouble.

David on 10/12/2014

Probably No. 2. Not big on quilting, tho, and I prefer pointed-toe ballet flats. I wear them all the time. I do have one pair of Tory Burch Revas. Like Kate Spade, too.

Gary on 08/05/2014

I like the appearance of no.2; I can almost feel them on my feet!

Aaron on 04/07/2014

If I had to choose then number two. I prefer flats with a pointed toe myself.

Larise Warren on 03/12/2014

I absolutely adore the LL Bean Rain Skimmer. But for the Tory Burch selection I like #2, Just because I think #1 is much more dressier and use with a dress. I have a similar flat that works well with Jeans and my Capri's. # 2 can work well for a guy.

fran on 12/24/2013

I prefer more plain flats with tight denim pants and clear barely there hose. Flats are great for driving but , i find myself pressing the gas so much more tham heels.
Ballet flats are #1

I'd pick shoe #1 the Serena by Tory Burch
Barry WAtkins on 11/16/2016

I love ballet flats . My favorite is travel foldable ballet flats. I wear silver,black,red and white. Guys try the silky toes side kicks and backup soles. They are inexpensive and very comfortable. Comes with a pouch to carry them in.

Leo on 11/17/2015

I think the reason is cause women have way better shoes. You don't even have to wear socks. The top of your feet will fell nice and you don't have to go through wearing socks. If you wear socks in tennis shoes they will smell. In fact most flats don't have a cloth sole. Thus they are easy to clean and don't smell. However shoes like tom's will smell

Leonardo on 01/31/2015

Shoe #1

david on 03/21/2013

i am a guy and have had a thing for wearing womens shoes since i was a kid and wear them with my guy clothes also, and i love all types and if you are guy you need to try these tory flats they feel amazing

teddletonmr on 11/20/2012

I'm with you Katie, I'd pick shoe #1 for my wife, she's a perfect candidate for this style of shoe. My feet are far to big, I'd never find a pair of women's flats that fit my men's size 15

katiem2 on 11/08/2012

I pick # 1 as I have a brilliant pair of shiny black flats, I'm so into everything clashing currently and for that reason I pick the Serena

A Special Thanks

I'd like to give a special thanks to the male reader who made this interview and hopefully awareness possible.

I've grown very fond of him, his class and open nature. I appreciate his insights and hope they help others to be themselves and wear what makes them feel good without the worry of criticism. You see dear friends we all experience it. Don't think there is anything wrong with your choice of hair, clothes or shoes. If it speaks to you answer. The problem is not with us,yet is two fold; We should express ourselves and ignore the negative. Life is a gift and it is perishable, Katie

"B", Thanks again for this opportunity it has been so fun working with you and sharing our ideas.


Brian's New Yet Long Awaited Tory Flats

They are so beautiful...
Tory Flatstory flats
tory flats

Bri Wearing Flats in Style

Bri in Fall Flat Fashions
Bri in Fall Flat Fashions
Gorgeous in Green
Gorgeous in Green
Perfection in Neutral
Perfection in Neutral
Functional Outdoor Flats
Functional Outdoor Flats
A Day at the Mall
A Day at the Mall
Updated: 09/08/2016, katiem2
Thank you! Would you like to post a comment now?

Hi, welcome to our chat area here you are safe to talk freely with Katie and Bri, the man featured in the article; together we collaborated on this project our labor of shoe love and are happy to welcome fellow shoe lovers to chat with us.

Viola 28 days ago

Hi there:) I'm Viola from Italy, my Instagram is "ballerineviola"...it means "purple ballet flats". I was born man but I wear everyday woman shoes, especially low cut, soft leather ballet flats.
I have started to wear then two years ago, now I have 11 beautiful pairs.
During winter I love to wear flat boots and a pair of white Minnetonka "Thunderbird", but my flats are always at my feet while I'm in my house.
I build them since six months and I've made two leather pairs for myself.
Feel free to see my Insta for pics, cheers:)

pinkpanther222 on 01/16/2017

Happy New Year!! In November, a good friend of mine went to the U.S.A for holidays and purchased a pair of California Navy Tieks for me. I have had them on my feet at home on a daily basis. Unfortunately, living in Western Canada in the winter isn't conducive to wearing ballet flats outside. The Tieks are amazingly comfortable. The Italian leather feels like butter and molds to my feet. I like the fact that they fold up and I can carry them in my handbag. The Tieks look awesome with my skinny jeans. I plan to wear them with my Lululemon capris, as well. I can hardly wait for spring to arrive and wear the Tieks outside on a regular basis.

MacMatzinger on 01/16/2017

Hello from Germany.
I know that there are more men, as well as me who like women's shoes.
Just also in the special Ballerinas, as well as I.
In my sphere I was also asked, why I the carrying?
Just because I like the style of the cut.
I find the ungainly shoes of the men mostly not good.
Why men may not carry also female clothes.
Just need getting used to.
If already crude lack of understanding with slightly aggressive hostility had, however.
Further thus Torybri.

Regards Arne

MacMatzinger on 01/16/2017

Hello from Germany.
I know that there are more men, as well as me who like women's shoes.
Just also in the special Ballerinas, as well as I.
In my sphere I was also asked, why I the carrying?
Just because I like the style of the cut.
I find the ungainly shoes of the men mostly not good.
Why men may not carry also female clothes.
Just need getting used to.
If already crude lack of understanding with slightly aggressive hostility had, however.
Further thus Torybri.
Regards Arne

Rob on 01/09/2017

Like you guys I live where it is cold as well. I still wear my flats unless it snows. The cold doesn't bother me. I am not outside that long in the winter anyway so since I am mostly inside I wear my flats. My flats are my everyday footware. Glad to see that there are more of us wearing our flats.

katiem2 on 01/03/2017

JT00T, it is great to have you with us. Please feel free to contribute anytime, keeps us informed as to your shoe love and experiences.

Torybri on 12/18/2016

Hi JT, glad you stumbled onto Katie's post about us guys that enjoy wearing women's flats. There does seems to be some misconception or something taboo about a guy wearing women's flats but I truly feel in this day and age that feeling is mostly brought on by ourselves. Most people don't care if you wear flats, you do it cuz you like it. Hopefully they see the person you are and like you for that not your shoes.

Much like your weather in Ohio, in my part of the world it's cold so I'm also wearing riding boots. Women's of course. :)

Thanks for stopping by and sharing your thoughts. Feel free to add your thoughts anytime.

JT007 on 12/15/2016

Just wanted to say that I'm so happy to have randomly stumbled on this article! I haven't read all of the comments yet, (though I will later) I can say its just great to see other guys women's flats or anything else. I've always struggled with my predilection for feminine shoes and other attire. I'll just never understand why it's so taboo. Nevertheless, I just wanted to say I love the way the article is presented and the accompanying photographs. I only have a few pairs of flats (2 to be specific, but I absolutely adore them!), but right now it's just way to cold for flats in Ohio! Instead, while I sit in my local star bucks, I'm wearing my newest pair of riding boots.......but I'm still literally clicking my heels in delight over this piece!

katiem2 on 11/28/2016

Tommy, welcome to our group

katiem2 on 11/28/2016

Thanks Bri, Love YOU!

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