Why Love Hurts so Much?

by katiem2

The pain of love, what to do and how to get past it. Learn how to enjoy love in your life not pain.

You may be asking yourself why love hurts so much and what's wrong with you that it always seems to be you who's hurting. Ever get the feeling somethings wrong with you? I'm here to tell you there is nothing wrong with you or the process of love. If there is we can work it out today, smooth out all those rough edges.

You're flat out being too hard on yourself. The problem is no doubt the expectations you're trying to live up to are both unrealistic and too high. Relax take a deep breath and prepare to let go of the undue pain.

How to Stop the Pain of Love?

You Don't Have to Hurt Anymore!

Love hurts so much due to the pressures you put on yourself.


Once you can't meet those pressures you feel intrinsically wrong as if there is something the matter with you when in fact there is not.


Nothing hurts more than feeling that way, this feeling is often one we mistakenly blame on love when all along it is the beating up process we inflict on ourselves causing the pain.


You make yourself out to be a freak someone who must be alone, unloved, and unworthy.


The feeling of unworthiness creates an insane amount of pain for all of us. I did say, all of us, and it's true we all feel a lot of the very same pain you're feeling right now when it comes to love, and yet most of it can be eliminated.

Why Love Hurts?

In order to get past the pain of a failed relationship you must believe that you are worthy of love.

You are worthy, you are probably barking up the wrong tree, that very tree you feel is the standard for love. Remember there is no standard other than your own unique desires and interest. Once you set your sights on this and others like you, love will become far less painful and in fact possibly painless.

First,  your standards are too high! Do you really expect to be the best thing that's ever happened to your first, second, or third date?


Really you honestly feel the first few dates will be magical? No, and honestly you wouldn't want them to as it's going to take some time before you know what you like and want in another. Understand there is no standard by which any love can be fairly measured. You don't have a guide or universal blueprint to follow.


The desires of your heart are the only directions you should follow. These directions will not get you lost, this natural GPS will direct you to the exact place you long to be, thus taking the pain out of the process.



Stop the Pain of Love

Stop Being so Hard on Yourself

Second stop being so hard on yourself. It's rare anyone experiences success in the first attempts at a relationship.

So when you fail chalk it up to anything but failure, it is practice. You don't become a great chef without creating a few horrible dishes. Anything you do takes a bit of practice, you have got to build your knowledge and therefore your qualifications.


Dating, which leads to love, is simply one more of life's adventures that gets better and better each time you do it. Sort of like learning to drive, no one wants to jump in the car with you until you've gotten your license. Give yourself a break and allow the learning phase to pass.


This learning phase is a vital process to your knowing what it is you want. Learning how to be a good date helps you to relax and enjoy the process of finding a pleasurable love experience.


It will also keep you from ending up in a relationship that will have you crying wishing just the opposite of what you do now, wishing you were single again! A bad match is a source of pain you can easily avoid.




 Dating is another key to painless love, stop taking the easy way out hoping you'll bump into love at the grocery store or coffee shop. Stop cutting corners, put yourself out there and date. Dating is a measure of your own self-worth. If you feel worthy of dating, you will be and others will realize you're worthy as well. Avoiding the dating process is selling yourself short. Let it be known you're dating and not in a serious relationship, taking your time and enjoying this dating process. There is no timeline as to how long a person should play the field and date others. It's a smart thing to do and gives you a lot of experience when it comes to the opposite sex, human nature, and dating. This process builds your qualifications and helps you land the perfect love for you. Anytime you do something with experience and confidence it always feels good.

Updated: 11/17/2020, katiem2
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