How to Find the Man and Love You Want

by katiem2

Learn to attract the love and man who is right for you stop fearing rejection and gain the confidence to get out there meet people and be someone others want.

Fear keeps most of us from putting ourselves out there, it makes us say stupid things, be someone we are not and approach the wrong people for fear of being rejected by those we really want. The probability of rejection is horrifying and has a lot of people standing alone without their special someone or worse settling for less. The most common reason rejection occurs is because the person approaching another comes off as fake or a bit creepy because they operate in fear. In order to get the man you want you must build the confidence to be yourself and know what you want. Anytime a woman without confidence works up the nerve to approach a man they get to the point far too quickly and come across as someone complete different. Men like women who are real and down to earth, it is hard to be like this when you are a bundle of nerves.

How to Find Mr. Right

When it comes to finding the man you want a calm cool approach is the way to go. This eliminates the dreaded rejection and the mental stress which often accompanying the infamous breaking the ice moment.

How to Find the Man for Me

Just ask a man for help in a casual manner to get the man of your dreams.

Talking to a man you’re interested in is one of the hardest fears and obstacles to overcome. The best way to end this problem forever is to change your expectation.

Don’t approach a man asking for his phone number, a date or if you can buy him a drink, this is to forward. The best way to approach a man you’re interested in is to keep it casual, a normal human interaction.

For instance you could ask a man to help you do something. Men are helpers, problem solvers and appreciate helping women. This is a great ice breaker that is seemingly innocent.. 

How to Approach a Man

There is a good way and a bad way to approach a man.

You could ask a man to hold your table for you while you look for friends. Or hold your jacket while you look for friends moving away from your table to do so. You could ask a man to help you move or adjust your table to make room for an additional chair in a bar, restaurant or coffee shop. Any opportunity you get to ask a man you find interesting or attractive to help you is a great way to make contact without any pressure

How Men Chose a Woman

Men like to choose the women they want.

Men like to choose the women they date as opposed to feeling they are accepting an offer they may not otherwise make on their own. You can put the idea before him by way of creating the opportunity for him to run with it.

It’s believed, regardless of how deeply rooted into a man’s subconscious, best selection of women do not solicit a man’s attention independently yet are naturally sought after by many men due to their natural level of desirability.  

Men are competitive by nature and instinctively want to feel they are making the selection of woman they want.  When you open communication with an innocent request with no pushy sales pitch a man takes notice and will take it from there if he is interested. You simply let the man take charge and engage you in the possibility of a date or the like.

Updated: 05/23/2013, katiem2
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katiem2 on 03/09/2017

DerdriuMarriner, Thank you for pointing that out, it is always helpful to get a clear and fresh take on matters of the heart.

DerdriuMarriner on 03/08/2017

katiem2, Very helpful and very insightful! In particular, I like the way you break the search down into manageable steps. Frank Beswick's comment gives a good real-life example of your steps!

katiem2 on 10/06/2014


frankbeswick on 06/26/2014

I will tell you how I started going out with my wife. I had met her some months earlier, but she was very shy. So nothing happened. Then I went to a football match, to which she had taken her little brother as a treat. I noticed that she was tending him, sorting out his coat, and I thought, "She seems a nice girl, I will chat her up." Then when we met I knew who she was. It seemed that she already liked me frrom our first meeting, but was very shy. That was Oct 4th 1975, and we are still together.

Lesson: men vary in what they want from a woman. I value a pleasant, caring character, and I found one. Pleasantness goes a long way with man.

katiem2 on 06/23/2014

EmmaSRose, If a person wants to find a man they can find a man....

katiem2 on 05/23/2013

Mike, Thanks once again a mans point of view is always appreciated.

teddletonmr on 05/23/2013

Good sound advice, this man adds his stamp of approval.

katiem2 on 04/10/2013

Ivan, I'd be happy to do that and will let you know when it's complete, in the mean time feel free to leave ANY questions regarding the desires of your heart on my relationship pages, you might like this as a start, The Way to a Woman's Heart -

katiem2 on 04/08/2013

Brenda, It's the new rule of thumb, makes sense to me having three brothers and such.

BrendaReeves on 04/08/2013

This sounds like good advice, Katie.

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