You’re sitting there one day, everything seems fine, but a slight headache develops, next a stomach ache... Neither is incapacitating at first, but they make going through the rest of your workday difficult.
On the surface, to everyone but you, and sometimes, actually, including you... You look fine. Perhaps a little lazy as your hair and bedroom is starting to indicate that you may be feeling under the weather. Your optimism comes to the rescue to throw off the scent of the underlying transformation under way and you just go about your day not realizing the accumulation of factors are changing you ever so slightly but tapering up!
Things that have bothered you for several months are starting to surface, rather they begin to come to the conscious thinking area where you find yourself irritated, especially if you see it again.
You don't really feel like anything is bothering you, but insomnia starts to hit home when every single night of the week your staring at the back of your eyelids picking at your fingers, and tossing and turning till you watch the dreadful sun come up.
Dreadful because you realize you didn't sleep but work calls and your time is up. You're a little irritated because you know that you will feel less than focused, tired, and ambition will take work. Each day becomes harder than the last...
A week of this goes by and you become irritable, your hair and makeup start to become work, and wearing that shirt you love every single day becomes a problem with everyone around you. Still, you (think you) feel fine, not super happy, but not necessarily negative, just tired all the time and can't figure out why. Energy drinks, coffee, and anything else you try simply don't do it.
You now feel this nagging nausea, a bit of a tummy issue you can't figure out. As the week goes by you start to feel different. Your patience level starts to wane and your frustration levels slowly rise...It's all happening so slow you don't even notice it when you look in the mirror (even if you look like the zombie to the right)!
You're likely now not even wearing make-up (women). You can't remember if you even brushed your teeth. Your mind is slowly losing its grip on reality... others can now see the metamorphosis your making into zombie-ism, especially people who haven't seen you for a few days. They tell you about it but your still in denial.
Your eyes are red from lack of sleep, an overloaded subconscious mind, anxiety sets in. You start to think that EVERYONE telling you that you look like crap, you look stressed, and your acting strange... is them just being mean, negative, or irrational.The irony is this is YOU right now, and everything they are telling you is actually true.
You start to think the world is against you, but in reality they are just trying to extend a hand, which you abrasively slap away (denial again). Your possession is starting to morph you and they see it at this point.
You're no longer capable of rational thought, you take everything wrong and don't see the reality of much clearly- but ironically you "believe" you do! (this is the part in the video below where the girl sees the groom making out with a woman that isn't his wife, but in reality it wasn't him at all, she replaced the rational thought processes of what her brain perceived with what wasn't really there!).
In essence, you creating baggage that isn't there!
My "Rationalize-r" Is Broken!
Things you rationalized away for so long are no longer going away, in fact they are all starting to haunt your thoughts, forcing you to deal with them... you feel a little mad (crazy).
What the heck is going on? How did this happen? Why are you so confused? So irritated? So anxious? Why are you bombarded with uncontrollable emotional outbursts and urges to want to crawl into a ball and escape your life? Why do you feel that everyone is against you, when in reality they are actually on your side!?
Your own body chemicals have taken you hostage, but your thoughts are the ring leader. This didn't happen quickly- often it happens so slow it's maddening! Let's talk about what's REALLY happening beneath the surface.