Mike Craggs on Wizzley

...a bid for a world of disconsolate melancholy.

Just think of me as the cloud to your silver-lined world. I carry my own little black fug around with me everywhere I go. Some people are inordinately cheerful, I'm depressingly miserable. I can't help it, it's just the way I am.

Not that talking to myself is a bad thing as far as I am concerned. It's about the only way I can get a sensible conversation on a planet full of lunatics. Not that I'm implying that you are a lunatic. No sir, no implication is intended.

As I was saying in the introduction I have tried most of these content creation sites and bombed completely on all of them. Some people have that warm winsome charm that just seems to attract people into throwing money at them. Me, they throw bricks at.

I see people turn up on sites like this and slap up one piece and make a thousand dollars a month without even trying. I try my hardest and have made about $100 dollars in two years. I'd be so much happier if I could learn how to live without food. And water. And shelter.

And to cap it all I don't have any redeeming features. I hate kids as well as adults, and as for puppies they're only good in burgers, preferably with fries.

The trouble is I find making money offline as hard as making it online. A life of eternal poverty.

And solitude.

Solitude is bliss. I love the sanity of solitude compared to the insanity of humanity. Those quiet moments when I can pause in a little oasis of calm, and wonder why a species that spends so much time talking about peace spends so much time killing each other.

Give me a quiet corner, some junk food - pizza, doughnuts, fried chicken (I'm greedy, not picky) - and large cup of coffee, and a good book, and I'm a happy man.

I just lied to you.

I'm as happy as I'm ever going to be would be a more accurate statement. Which, by mainstream standards, ain't to happy at all. But for us super grumps, the grumpy fundamentalists, it's about as good as it gets. Solitude is the closest thing to happiness I know.

So having thoroughly depressed you by this stage, I, Mike Craggs - supergrump extraordinaire - shall now amble off into the distance firmly ensconsed in my own little black cloud.

Have fun!