Buy Bacon Online

by nicomp

Everyone loves bacon. Thankfully donated by pigs, it has become the 3rd most popular food product at grocery stores across the fruited plain. It also goes great with fruit.

Herein we present a veritable plethora of bacon-related items. Whip out your credit card and order up voluminous amounts of your favorite flavor. You can't have too much of it. Think about yourself just this once: if you don't buy yourself bacon, who will?

We won't run out of bacon, but be careful not to bump against your credit limit before you stock your larders.

Bacon Bandages

The almost but not quite magical healing powers of bacon have long been studied by community college grad students on government grants. Nothing concrete has arisen, but these luscious bandages just might provide a missing piece of the puzzle. Adorn your cuts and scrapes with adhesive strips that don't look at all like mainstream adhesive strips: you'll feel instantly hungry and your bleeding may staunch.

BACON shaped themed Adhesive Bandages

Ouch! That smarts! Treat your minor cuts, scrapes and scratches with the incredible healing power of meat. And if a fancy bandage isn't enough to dry up your tears, how about a ...

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Bacon Hot Sauce

Hot Sauce makes everything taste better. Adding bacon to it just might upset the delicate balance of nature, although folks at the Food Channel can't help but approve. Be honest: you were planning to apply your plain hot sauce to your plain bacon anyway. This product automatically makes your life easier.

Dump mass quantities of this product onto anything you eat. It goes wonderfully with Fritos, Doritos, Cheetos, Tostitos, and Pringles.

Bacon Flavored Hot Sauce, 5 Ounce

A delicious combination of your two favorite things: Bacon and Hot Sauce. Water, Distilled Vinegar, Cayenne Pepper, New Mexico Chili, Salt, Natural Flavor, Maltodextrin, Autolyz...

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Bacon Magnet

Your refrigerator is already adorned with magnets from Niagra Falls, Mt. Vernon, The Grand Canyon, and Dollywood. A bacon-shaped magnet completes your decor. This adorable accoutrement serves to remind you why you strolled into the kitchen in the first place. Don't risk coming away from the larder empty-handed: bacon will always be at the top of your mind.

Bacon Slices Magnet Pack - 2 Bacon Strip Magnets Per Pack

Everything is better with bacon on it! Slap these fun meaty bacon strip magnets on your fridge, locker, dorm doors.... Makes a great gift too! Check out all our bacony products!...

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Bacon Phone Cover

When you phone up the pizza store for a large bacon-lovers pizza with extra bacon, this is what your phone should be wrapped in. Don't swath your digital device in real bacon.

Yes, you have a cutting-edge cellular phone for which you stood in line throughout a long cold Saturday afternoon at the mall. Your friends admire and envy your persistence and they long to be just like you. A bacon themed enclosure will make them love you even more.

Bacon Duck Tape

Imagine that it's your turn to drive to the store for more bacon. You climb into your Ford F350. You fire up the turbo diesel. You glance into the rear-view mirror to check for neighbors who might also be heading out for more bacon. To your horror, the mirror has fallen off. There's a mirror-shaped hole where this crucial device used to be.

Anyway, don't plan to fix it with this tape, but buy the tape anyway because it has bacon on it.

Freeze-dried Bacon

Surviving the end of the world will be much more enjoyable when there's bacon at the ready. This superfood freeze-dries as well as any other doomsday prepper edible. Don't plan to scrounge burned-out suburban malls looking for anything with bacon in it: plan to stay home in your bunker enjoying your satellite TV and reconstituted but nutritionally balanced gourmet meals.

Society will rise again and there will be more bacon.

Fully Cooked Bacon, Ready to Eat, 80 Slices Per Pack / Case, 10 Year Shelf Life, Superior to Cann...

FULLY COOKED - READY TO EAT: 80 Slices - Thick, Center Cut, Precooked, Smoked, full flavor 100% REAL Pork Bacon. Why 80-Slice bacon packs? Because more bacon and less packaging ...

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Conclusion

It's a bacony world. Jump in.

Photo courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.net : Suat Eman

Updated: 12/20/2012, nicomp
 
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nicomp on 01/04/2013

Indeed, this page generates income for authors based on affiliate relationships with our partners, including Amazon, Google and others. If there is any.

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