I'm a Runescape criminal. Let me inspire you

by Fargy

Feeling bored? A little listless in Runescape? A little ill at ease? Runescape is a game of imagination. Let's see if we can find that spark again.

At some time in your life you should be a criminal. You have to be, if you want to express your identity. Otherwise you are doomed to a life of serving others in their lives.

Famous criminals are that lot who started the USA and that woman who wouldn't give up her seat on a bus. Being a criminal is good, it means you stood up for something.

What does this have to do with Runescape?

Runescape is a game of imagination. You make the rules.

You don't have to gain any experience, you don't have to make any gold.

You don't have to appear on high scores.

Those are all rules of the game that someone made up and that people follow without thinking about.

Be a criminal, break the rules. Live a little.

Moderate me.

The Runescape Official forums are a good way to learn about crime in Runescape.

You will learn about the myriad ways to become hidden, banned, muted and otherwise sanctioned.

You can be policed for any old reason.  That's one of the rules, Jagex doesn't need a reason.

Here you can begin your virtual life of Runescape crime.

I remember my first post was locked by a JMod called Dave, probably long gone by now, but forever in my memory.  That was 12,778 forum posts ago.  Time flies and all that.

Everyone who has posted any amount of times on the Runescape forums will have been moderated.  Usually minor stuff like posting in the wrong forum, or in capital letters, or a duplicate post or because the forum moderator didn't like it.

Runescape don't kid around with moderation.  Everything in moderation!

One would think this level of policing would lead to super forums.  Forums that are beacons of light in the cosmos.  Sadly that's not the case.  Because the criminals hold grudges and the forums get full of bitterness, and that twists the forums so that people post less.  They might read but no way in the world do they want to be criminal by risking a post.

Be criminal!  That's my advice.  Get your words out there.  Get heard.  Because we need that to help Runescape improve.


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Play like a job.

Remember when you first started?

Picture it now.  Your first time into Runescape.

Close your eyes.

Take it easy, remember what it was like.


My first time was wonderful.

There was nothing.  I had no idea what to do, some sort of thing on Tutorial Island where I just followed Vivathia around.  Vivathia's my better half, not a terribly difficult job.

I wandered around like a kid in a candy store.   The world seemed huge, Lumbridge seemed huge.

We spent a week or two just in Lumbridge, fishing and taking on fearsome goblins.  And rats, rats the size of cats!

We played for eight years or so, and those moments when Runescape could surprise were glimmers of its potential.  It still has that promise.

But we have become laden down with rules.

We wear a suit and play our job.

We should strip off and run naked.  We should be criminals.

There is no need for 9 to 5 in Runescape.

There is no need to struggle for fame on a high scores board.

Runescape is more than that.

Runescape now seems like a game for five lads to Skype together and kill monsters for uber loot and the fastest experience possible.

That's the trap Jagex fell into.

They should become criminals and break their own rules.  Which they copied anyhow from other games.

Get naked Jagex, throw your rules away.


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Play into the future.

Jagex became rule-bound, it obeyed the rules that said players want lots of experience and they want piles of gold and they want it NOW!

Players became rule-bound, they thought lots of experience and lots of gold would mean lots of fun.

And in between players and Jagex was the rule-bound maze of the forums.

Feel a little criminal?

Don't gain gold.  Defy the mantra of experience gain.

Think about what you want in a game where anything is possible.

Then become daring and ask for it from Jagex.

On the forums you risk banning and other punishments for the crime of speaking.

But it'll be worth it.


I'm going to ask them for content we can design.  Perhaps a shield that I designed every pixel of.

I like shields, helps keep me safe from the slings and arrows of outrageous forums.

See that would be mine, that would be a brand new thing.

Getting a pile of gold because everyone else gets piles seems a little boring compared to a shield I made with my Toulousian Paint skills.  I would feel as good as a Jagex developer does.

The game world would become huge again.  The rules that bind would start to slip away again.


Be a criminal, ask for more.



Same guy, different stuff.

Anything is possible in virtual worlds. With a click of the keyboard we can summon dragons, ride whirlwinds, swing swords and hit the Quit button.
Runescape has entered the Age of Bonds. Implementing a new system of microtransactions in a major way.
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Updated: 11/05/2013, Fargy
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crypt0 on 03/20/2016

I am criminal and I allegedly stole a bunch pixelated gold for real-money. I earned a ton, I fact I leaved in shack with 342 holes on my roof and small creaking bamboo stair... a mat, a small stove made of porcelain and a bucket to fill with water by pumping it out off the ground..

The life of a Virtual Millionaire ... Amazing .. because I earned an awful ton of cash. When this goons think they can silence me, they're wrong.

Sends me an anonymous Death Threat email... Thinks I am that dumb..

Oh look - your email headers betrayed you!

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