Why Love Hurts and How to Stop the Pain

by katiem2

Love can be painful. Learn the reasons why love hurts so bad and how to avoid the pain of love.

You fall in love and things couldn’t be better and then from out of the blue you're hit with the fact that love hurts. It is true love runs both hot and cold with the cold part often times holding on longer than we'd like.

The pain is most often due to a straw that breaks you or your lovers back. The compromises made by one or the other now seem to be in vain. People want to be understanding and over look things to keep the relationship alive and well and yet sometimes the cons out weight the pros.

How to Deal with the Pain of Love

Why Love Hurts

But this doesn't always happen, there are those nagging thoughts in the back of our mind that hang around taunting us.  Why do relationships have to experience hurt and pain?  What can be done to avoid this dreadful pain or worse yet an end to love?

  • Fights and conflict do occur in all romances and yet they can be reduced.
  • You can fine tune your relationship to avoid hurt, pain and even breaking up with a few simple adjustments.  
  • The pain and suffering of love can be reduced and even eliminated with a bit of attention to detail.
Learn how to find your true love with the understanding of others and their type. Learn the six different types of love and the abilities others have to love you back.

Could This be Love

How to tell if someone has feelings for you.

You must first understand love can be both exhilarating and exhausting at the same time.  You’re in warp speed when love first hits with its intense emotions and energy bouncing off one another.  Your mind races, your adrenaline rushes and you’re intensely focused on what you do, how you look and the up keep of your surroundings. You want to do everything right, make it work and not mess this up right?  Oh the pain, this need!  

The mere drive to make everything perfect making sure this is the one, doing everything right is exhausting.  Love is painful just as an intense work out routine is, you work every aspect of your life to perfection to land the love you crave all the while creating a great deal of anticipation!  This anticipation often so intense it's accompanied by pain.  Love hurts for many many reasons and yet when we know what we're doing we can eliminate the pain, push past it and enjoy the realationship.

Why do I always attract cheaters? Cheating is something you can avoid. Learn why people cheat, how to spot a cheater and avoid it. Cheating hurts and can be avoided.

How to Bring Love into Your Life

Learn how to bring love into your life and be prepared for handling love.

You've never cared more as suddenly you want to impress someone. This makes you take a hard look at you and your life. It can be painful to realize your weakness as you consider areas you need to improve.  Falling in love is a great time in ones life as it makes us want to be a better person.  Love makes us a better person as we strive to be everything we think it takes to get the love we desire.  The problem falls with the determination to keep this momentum going after we land the catch of our lives.  Many of us stop with the new and improved version of ourselves and fall back to our old ways.  This is a shock to the person we’ve landed and often times they do not like the reverse in you and in fact find it to be a betrayal.  Did you make a shift to get this person and if so did you maintain those changes?

Learn the signs of falling in love. Know for sure if this is love and if in fact they love you back.

4) More Reasons Love Hurts

Pain is not the same for everyone!

Why Love is Painful?         

  • Looking hard at your life from another’s point can be painful.
  • Love is painful when you learn the person you love is disappointed in you.
  • Love is very painful when the connection to your lover is broken.
  • Love is painful when you feel the void of communication and sharing.
  • Making changes can be difficult, you may feel you're not good enough.
  • Being honest about changes in the relationship are painful.
  • Love can be painful as many choose to lose weight, diets are painful at first.
  • You may choose to get in shape, exercise can be painful if you're out of shape as you both struggle to tone your body, lose weight and face the present condition of your body.
  • If the object of your affection has no interest in you, but this is not really love is it?

 T  The good news is the painful changes and realizations are worth it. These changes make for a better life all the way around.  Although any type of change is hard to consistently maintain, it can be done with a bit of determination.   

Stick with the changes that created this love experience you treasure so much.  In no time the new and improved you will become second nature, a habit, just as the old you once was.  It is more than worth it so suck it up and evolve as you know you really want love to hang around don’t you?

Stop waiting around for love to happen, learn all the many things you can do today to catch the love of your life. The steps to attracting love into your life.

How to Fix Broken Relationships

Finding the real you again and just being yourself helps you to fix a broken love affair.

If you've been in a relationship and broke up due to a conflict or other reason? This is painful indeed as you may want desperately to work it out and get back together. Who ever said, "it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved before" was spot on!

When you’re set on getting back together, it’s hard going back in time and explaining all the reasons that brought this on.  There are a lot of little things we let slide yet still remain like that garbage in the bottom of the can. You know the stuff you toss aside and forget about. When you least expect it a bad scent fills the air and the only thing you want to do is get rid of it hoping noone notices. 

How to be a Great Partner

In order to have a successful relationship you must first understand what it takes to be a good partner.

Taking out that stinky garbage is how we feel once the stuff we let slide piles up and wears us down. How is it we can toss out a great relationship because we made the choice to leave the garbage stuffed down and unattended. We do so because most of us don’t like conflict and put it off. Just like taking out the trash we often wait till the can is packed and overflowing. That can is now toxic and we’ll race like mad to kick it to the curb. 

I’ve heard it best said like this; we avoid the pain of change until the pain of staying the same exceeds the pain of change.  

Resources to Help

How to Handle the Ups and Downs

Be honest about you and your partner to handle the ups and downs of love and relationships.

Love can be painful as painful situations arise when and if your partner acts in an uncomfortable manner. When you fall in love you feel amazingly different and as if you could change the world, fact is neither you nor the world around you changes. 

It’s important to be careful and honest with the person you have fallen in love with or the door could slam in your face. Sooner or later you both wake up in the same reality.

Falling in love lays the foundation for the entire relationship. We tend to form relationship habits and set the standard for the relationships future during this time.

Answer the age old question what is love and make sense of it all. Learn to understand love and make love work for you.

Get the Relationship Right

The Reconciliation is the New Beginning!

The time is now, in the first stages of the relationship, to share what you really like and don't. When the relationship is new the other person listens better than at any other time, the time is now, to let them know what matters most to you, what you like, don't like, cannot live with or without!  It's really that simple, honesty is the best policy!

If you don’t let your partner know what drives you nuts now they may form relationship habits that drive you to take out the trash and end an otherwise perfect relationship. This is the number one reason relationships fail. You must work out the best blueprint to guide you through a life of loving and wonderful moments.

This can happen very easily by learning to communicate what’s important to you and what drives you crazy. It's early on in the love affair that you should develop good habits you'll enjoy for the long haul.  Let’s face it when falling in love we all act a little goofy. It is crucial to understand the opposite sex and have good relationship skills in order to make this a love that will last.

Don’t let the love of you life get away because you didn’t open your mouth and be honest with them when easiest to do so. Build good relationship skills and a firm understanding of the opposite sex by doing just a little research. There a just a few things you will need to know so you can give the falling in love process your all and every chance of making it!

Much Love and Happiness, Katie

Updated: 05/25/2013, katiem2
Thank you! Would you like to post a comment now?

Chat about the pain of love and the ups and downs of any relationship

ethelsmith on 12/29/2011

Yes life and love can be so complicated.

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